Bill O'Reilly Should Not Be Shot and Killed

Editorial by Allan Piper

Critics of Bill O'Reilly believe he bears responsibility for the death of George Tiller. Tiller, a Kansas doctor who performed women's health services including abortion, was gunned down in his church on Sunday. Although Bill O'Reilly was not the gunman, he was behind a personal attack campaign against Tiller, whom he named on twenty-nine episodes of his show, calling him "Tiller the Baby Killer."

It is important to note, that while Bill O'Reilly called Tiller a murderer, made baseless accusations of child-rape against him, and compared him to a Nazi, he did not specifically ask anyone in his audience to kill him. Sure, in the twenty-nine times he featured Tiller, Bill O'Reilly may have referred to Tiller's clinic as a "death mill;" he may have railed that the law would not stop Tiller but that "Judgment Day" would; he may have said that Tiller's continued existence was "a disgrace upon everyone who lives in Kansas;" he may have gone even as far as to say that anyone who did not do something to stop Tiller "has blood on their hands," but never once did he explicitly call for an assassination.

For this reason, we at the Inquisition want to make it very clear that we are not calling for the retributive assassination of Bill O'Reilly. That would be wrong. In no way would we ever suggest that anyone should go buy a rifle or shotgun (which can be purchased without a waiting period at sporting goods stores in most states), proceed to the Fox News studio (which is located at 1211 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY) and shoot Bill the Killer O'Reilly at close range in the head (which has a greater likelihood of fatality than in the chest).

Even though Bill O'Reilly virtually baited his audience into taking matters into their own hands, and even though a vigilante gun-death is the only justice he is ever likely to face, killing him would be a crime, just like running a red light late at night, or failing to report tips on your tax return. Sure, you would be hailed as a hero by many, and you might well save the lives of countless innocent people Bill O'Reilly has yet to attack, but it would be wrong. Whatever you do, PLEASE DO not KILL BILL O'REILLY.

I don't know if we can make it any more clear.