Wednesday, July 14, 2010

AZ Senator Stands Up for Suffering Billionaires

WASHINGTON, DC- Senate Minority Whip Jon Kyl (R-AZ) has drawn criticism for blocking the extension of unemployment benefits. As one of the leaders of a Republican filibuster, Kyl has ensured that 3.2 million Americans who lost their jobs in this recession will be cut off from benefits by the end of the month. Kyl argues that at a time of record deficit, America cannot afford an extra $35 billion for a program that he believes discourages people from looking for work.

This week, Kyl showed that despite his fiscal austerity, he is not without compassion. The Arizona senator appeared on Fox News Sunday to defend the extension of the Bush tax cut for the wealthiest Americans, at a cost of $678 billion-- a number many economists believe to be larger than $35 billion.

Percy Whetherby, of the Billionaires of America Relief Fund (BARF) praises Kyl's priorities. "Middle class Americans don't understand how much billionaires suffer during a recession," he explains. "An over-leveraged billionaire may have to sell off a football team, or a European castle," adding, "the average American never has to sell off anything bigger than an engagement ring, or a kidney."

A spokesperson for the senator describes Kyl's position as a matter of simple decency: "No billionaire should have to choose between putting food on the table that once belonged to Louis XIV, and putting the food in a diamond encrusted display case to be dangled teasingly over the heads of hungry peasants via helicopter."

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